“I dumped you so you could become the man you are a hundred years from now.”
“That doesn’t make sense.”
“Listen, I’m from the future and the man you’re going to become needs to be dumped by me.”
“So you’re saying you’re from the future and that your reason for dumping me was so I can grow into some kind of known person in your time?”
“Yes. This has to happen in order to make my future possible.”
“So, what kind of person do I become in order to make your future come true?”
“I can’t tell you that.”
“You’re awful. I hope you die. What kind of way is that to be dumped?”
“It is the way it has to be.”
“How important do I become as a reaction to this spectacle of dog shit?”
“I can’t tell you that because it would create a hyper-time space vortex.”
“You have no idea what that means do you? You said hyper-time, but what you meant was HORSESHIT.”
“Take that however you want, it is no longer a concern of this vessel.”
“Vessel? How does this Vessel work? Please tell me they programmed you with manipulation and Intel processors, because I find it hard to believe that anything would run on Intel in the future.”
“I cannot tell you because that would endanger the future.”
“You cannot. Bleep blorp.”
“No reason to be rude.”
“Shut up. This is your stop. See you next Tuesday.”
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